Enter The Dream Realm Vol. 72 – Morph’s Crusade: Don’t Watch? Don’t Bitch!

“Guess Who’s Back…”
Enter The Dream Realm

Volume Seventy-Two

Morph’s Crusade: Don’t Watch? Don’t Bitch!


Welcome, Dreamers, to the long-awaited, much anticipated, and return-marking Seventy-Second Edition of Enter The Dream Realm. I am Morpheus, Master of the Dreaming, and I will be your guide through this land of Nightmares and Dreamscapes. Greetings all, from the Land of the Rising Sun. To those of you who remember me, I give a hearty what’s up, and those of you new to the Dream Realm I bid you a cordial welcome. It’s good to be back here on Lords of Pain after an extended hiatus, and I’m excited about the prospect of getting to talk wrestling (among other things) with you guys once again. Time to get our geek on and inject some awesome into this bitch.

The Dream Realm is going to be a little bit different than it used to be back in the day. It’s going to be a bit more freeform and not so rigidly structured. Now, that’s not to say that I’m not going to pull out an old school ETDR with the sections and whatnot from time to time, but it won’t happen every time. The Dream Realm isn’t the only thing I’ve got in the works here, either. For one thing, expect the triumphant return of FACT or FICTION to the LOP Main Page in the next couple of weeks. There are a couple of other things I’ve got coming your way as well, but you’ll just have to wait to find out what those are, now, won’t you?

Before we get this thing underway, I want to ask all you Dreamers out there a question. I am in the middle of writing a series of columns in the style of a movie that centers around a Zombie Apocalypse scenario brought about by the mindless droning of Hardy fans. These columns are entirely geared toward being pure entertainment and have little in the way of actual wrestling discussion in them, but are funny as hell. At least my mom thinks so. Anyway, I am including the links below to the column I wrote that inspired the movie, and the first three parts of the movie that I have written so far.

What I want to know from all of you out there in Dreamland is whether or not this is something you would be interested in seeing me post here for you all to read, or if you aren’t so interested, in which case I will continue posting the remainder of this series in the LOP Columns Forum. Drop me an email with your opinion on the matter at Alright, that’s more than enough banter. Hopefully you will find this Seventy-Second sojourn through the Dream Realm both enlightening and entertaining. So, without any further ado, let the Dreams begin!


Morph’s Crusade: Don’t Watch? Don’t Bitch!

There is a topic that has been on my mind for quite some time, and recently made its way to the forefront of my thoughts thanks to a discussion in the Facebook feedback to Sean_Taylor’s latest column. If you haven’t read it yet, I recommend doing so. I’ll even provide you with the link. The Classroom – After School Detention: Headline News. I highly recommend checking out the feedback at the bottom of the page, as it’s probably some of the best and most intelligent discussion I’ve seen from the Facebook Feedback option on LOP.

This feedback discussion left me with a few burning philosophical quandaries that I could no longer go without addressing. First and foremost is something I see so commonly that it just jumped to the front of the line in my mind. It seems that there is an overabundance of people who proclaim outright that they don’t watch either WWE or TNA and then proceed to bash the product that the company in question is presenting. I used to see an alarming amount of this in the forums over the years, but now I see even greater amounts of it plastered in the comments left on all the articles on this site. The problem with this sort of thing, at least for me, is that such an argument defies all laws of logic.

If people don’t watch WWE, or TNA, or PPV shows, etc., how do they know they don’t like it?

I see so much of this sort of thing that it simply boggles my mind. It would be one thing if someone were to state that they hated what was being presented at a particular time so they stopped watching. That’s fine. It would be alright if they went on to complain about what it was that forced their hands to change the channel at the time. A lot of people aren’t doing that, though. They are saying that the current product and shows suck based on previous experiences that were less-than-stellar. That’s the big issue. The problem that I have is when people say things like “I don’t watch the WWE because it sucks.” The problem with that statement, and what makes it logically fallible, is the use of the present tense throughout.

If you haven’t seen it, how do you know you don’t like it?

Now, I know that this is the internet and the same rules don’t apply here as in real life, but can you imagine actually having a conversation like that with someone face to face in the real world? Enter the cut scene…

Jaded Smark – “Man, I can’t believe how much the WWE sucks.”

Someone Else – “Oh, you saw RAW last night too?”

Jaded Smark – “No way. I refuse to watch it because I know how bad it sucks.”

Someone Else – “Actually, last night was pretty good.”

Jaded Smark – “No it wasn’t.”

Someone Else – “But you said you didn’t watch it.”

Jaded Smark – “I didn’t.”

Someone Else – “Then how do you know it sucked?”

Jaded Smark – “Because the WWE can’t do anything right.”

Someone Else – “Well, sometimes maybe, but last night’s show was actually pretty good.”

Jaded Smark – “No, last night’s show was terrible.”

Someone Else – “But you didn’t watch it?”

Jaded Smark – “Nope.”

Someone Else – *head a splode*

…And we’re back. This is the type of argument that drives me to my wits’ end when reading a lot of the posts that are made on this site. Aside from the obvious epic logic fails contained in such comments, there is an even bigger issue at hand here. By not watching the product at all, you are basically writing it off and saying you don’t care to know whether or not it is good, bad, or indifferent. If you have decided to stop watching because you didn’t like what you were seeing, this fact immediately and automatically biases your opinion to the negative, and in all honesty negates the validity of an argument put forth about whether or not it’s any good.

Now, choosing not to watch WWE, TNA, or any other television program is your prerogative, obviously, and more power to you for making that decision. If you don’t like what you see and you stop watching it, that’s all well and good. It’s no skin off of my back, for sure. However, continuing to comment negatively on the product after cutting it out of your routine is where I have to raise the red flag.

Some of you may be thinking, “But M, I read the results of the shows so I know what’s going on, and based on those results I can tell that there is a high level of sucktitude.” This, again, raises a red flag, and here’s why. First, no matter how well transcribed, reading about something is NEVER a substitute for experiencing it firsthand. There are subtleties that simply cannot translate to the written word no matter how hard we try. The results posted on news sites are great resources for getting an idea of what you missed by not watching a show, but they are NOT intended to be a blanket substitute for watching the product as a whole.

In addition, there are very few show recaps or reviews that I have ever, and The Morph means EVER, read that are not at least partially slanted by the point of view of the person writing it. Objectivity is a rare gift that few truly possess, and even those that have it in spades tend to let at least small amounts of their own opinions bleed through into their writing. Effectively, this means that by relying on reading the results instead of watching the shows, you are “seeing” the product through someone else’s eyes. Who is to say that your opinions, had you bothered to watch the product yourself, would have been the same as the person who wrote the results you read? I would venture to say that complete synchronicity of two people’s points of view is a rare occurrence.

To have an opinion about something, you must experience it. To give an opinion without the requisite experience is not only meaningless, but bordering on ignorant in the process. For someone to espouse an opinion on something that they haven’t bothered to even experience first-hand is ludicrous and biased toward the person’s prejudicial dispositions. Even worse, if you don’t watch and instead rely on news updates to keep up with what is going on in wrestling, you are falling victim to not only your own prejudicial dispositions, but those of the person writing the updates you are reading.

Furthermore, if you don’t watch wrestling because you don’t like it, why go to wrestling sites and talk trash about it? Wrestling is quite possibly the only hobby or interest that I know of where the people who partake in said interest spend most of their time badmouthing it. For the life of me, I will never understand why.

What kind of sense does it make to invest so much time, effort, and mental energy into something that makes you so unhappy? It’s not something you’re obligated to continue, like a loveless marriage to a heartless, cheating she-devil (not that I ever had any previous personal experience with that, mind you). It’s wrestling. It’s a fucking TV show. Why waste your breath on something you hate so much? You’re only senselessly raising your blood pressure.

Moreover, you’re ruining it for those of us who still enjoy it, and that would be the biggest problem I have with the people who do this sort of thing.

I have seen a lot of people over the years who sign up to wrestling forums and come in as a huge wrestling fan, ready and willing to talk about the thing they love most. They present a positive viewpoint and express their joy only to be met with snide comments and abuse from other people because they “actually like this crap.” Some of these people don’t put up with that trash and leave, never to return. Others, and I daresay more than those that leave, slowly change their opinions and views to match those around them so that they fit in. This is a topic I touched on in my COTM offering about a month back, which you can find at, and it is one I am very passionate about.

This has only gotten worse now with the Facebook Comment option on all of the articles on the site. It used to be that people had to take the time and effort to sign up for the forums and post there to be subjected to this sort of thing. Now it’s become easy for anyone with a Facebook account, which I daresay is most of us, to post whatever they want, whenever they want without any effort or thought whatsoever. In these comments, I have seen a few people over the last few months evolve from bright-eyed wrestling fans to jaded cynics because of the constant inundation of negativity they are subjected to, whether directly or indirectly.

This is something that just straight up pisses me off. I have tried thus far in this column to remain cool-headed and eloquent (only one F-bomb – a personal best!), but the more I type, the angrier I get. You jaded assholes out there are totally ruining the experiences of those around you when you mindlessly spout off all this negativity.

Negativity in general is another topic for another time, but the worst perpetrators of this asininity are the ones I’ve been talking about all along; those who don’t watch but still bitch. Not only are you helping to taint the wrestling experience for those around you, but you’re doing it without even having the decency to bother experiencing it firsthand. The worst part of it is that 99% of you who do this have had your opinions tainted by the negativity that YOU have been inundated with over the weeks/months/years. Try having an original thought for once. You just might like it.

If you hate wrestling so much, fine. Stop watching. But if you stop watching, stop complaining. It really is as simple as that.

Don’t Watch? Don’t Bitch!

I don’t care what you do with your time. Find another TV show that you don’t hate with the fire of a thousand suns. Buy a new video game. I can tell you that SmackDown! Vs. RAW 2011 is pretty awesome, but you’ll probably find some lame ass excuse to piss all over that as well. Get a girlfriend (highly recommended for those of you who haven’t tried it). Hell, there are all sorts of things out there that people use to occupy their time; anything from stamp collecting to hentai porn addictions. Go out and find yourself a new hobby.

Just stop trying to fuck with mine.

Vanishing Vagaries

  • If you aren’t even bothering to watch wrestling, then kindly keep your opinions about the product you are ignoring to yourself.

The Dream Master encourages you to check out three particularly outstanding columns in the LOP Columns Forum:
Shane – Shanetime Presents: Shit The Other Page Says
Mazza – Maz Debating – And I’m Telling You I’m Not Going – (S01-E01)
YourAyatollah & Degenerate – The Power Trip: Get Born Again

This brings to a close this return edition of Enter The Dream Realm. Any feedback you have, as always, would certainly be greatly appreciated and can be sent to me via email at Thanks again to all the faithful Dreamers out there who stuck with this shebang, even during my hiatus over the last couple of years, and mad crazy props to the site staff and dwellers for welcoming me back with open arms. It’s definitely good to be home. I hope that those of you that haven’t yet will take the time to check out some of the great writers we have in the LOP Columns Forum. Until next time, Stay Metal, sleep well, and I’ll see you in your Dreams!

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